"....buddy..."

"....he used to say that it was better to have one friend of great value than many friends who were good for nothing..."



".....buddy...A friend or a partner for a particular activity....buddy system....any system in which two people work together, especially for safety reasons.....hehhehe..actualy mende da lama wujud...ntah la tibe2 rase nak wat mende ni kat kelas..tp cam ok je pun...lagi a rase nak buat coz ade la 2 3 org dak2 aku da merasa pengalaman 'buddy' ni...get '+' feedback...so leh la apply...arini da masuk ari ke 2 sistem 'buddy' berjalan kat sem 6 nyer kelas...utk subjek aku je...hahahha..."




"...caranye mudah je....tiap sorang akan dapat sorang 'buddy'...mean dia akan memerhati 'buddy'nye...dan 'buddy' akan memerhatikan dia...huuuu...memerhati dan diperhati...cam mana nak idop ni...asik kene usha je...hahaha....then 'buddy' tu bagi la komen pe2 yg ptot...tak kesa a..samada komen secara kritikan ke...motivasi ke...peringatn ke...pe2 je a...hope yg membina..bukan membunuh...huuuuuu....."


"....then komen tersebut nak la diluahkan atas kertas...pahtu kertas tu perlu dimasukan ke dalam kotak...setelah sume da send surat tuuu...apalagi...aku bace la...hahhaha menggelebah dorang sume...berdebar2..ye r...da kene usha..dan dapat komen lak tu...mau nyer tak cuak...pergerkan seharian diperhatikan....huuuuuu...aku kene bace sume note tu..kalu tak..kot kantoi...ye r..cam tulisan la...jenis ayat la...hehhe..so playsafe...better aku je yg bace...."





"....haihhhh...sebenarnyer sistem 'buddy' ni bagos gak....tp kalu pikir balik...hmmm...allah da anto 2 malaikat utk usha kita....nape x rase pe2...hehehehe...ni buat sistem 'buddy' baru la nak jadi org baik2...hehhee..aku pun sama dengan je kot..yg malaikat duk kiri kanan ni...tanak lak kita amik tau...tp tu a lumrah idop kita kan..selagi mende x jadi depan mata....takn ade pe2 yg brubah...huuuuuu....."

"...so be a good 'buddy'....now n ever...."

p/s jgn lupa note utk saya gak...hahha

".....Jauhi Aku..."

"...sticks and stones will break our bones, but words will break our hearts..."



Ikhlasnya hati
Sering kali disalah erti
Tulusnya budi
Tidak pernah engkau hargai
Berlalu pergi dengan
Kelukaan ini
Ku mengalah... ku bersabar

Bertentang mata seolah-olah tiada apa
Berpaling muka ada saja yang tidak kena
Mencari sebab serta alasan yang kukuh
Supaya tercapai hajatmu

Manis dibibir memutar kata
Malah kau tuduh akulah segala penyebabnya
Siapa terlena pastinya terpukau
Pujukmu, rayumu, suaramu
Yang menagih simpati dan harapan

Engkau pastinya tersenyum
Dengan pengunduran diriku
Tetapi bagi ku pula
Suatu ketenangan

Andai kita terus bersama
Belum tentu kita bahagia
Selagi tidak kau ubah
Cara hidupmu

Ada rahmatnya
Bila tidak lagi bersama
Terasa jauh
Diriku ini dengan dosa

Ku tinggalkanmu walau tanpa kerelaan
Yang nyata kau tidak berubah...

Katalah apa yang kau ingin
Selagi kau dapat berkata
Memang begitu sikapmu
Semenjak dahulu



"...stay away!!..hahhaha...nape gitu...cakap kat sape...ntah lor..cam skang cuba jauhi dari orang yg ada kat sekeliling...aku yg kene blah ke...atau dorang yg kene jauhi aku..hmmm...tp pe2 pun skang..just jauhi aku....hahhaa...mengong....feelin' rite now...tu la nyer...ni sume perasaan jiwa x tenteram....tanak sesape ade berhanpiran...menyemakkk jeee...stay away from me plis....hehhee tu ke perasaan kalu org jiwe kacau....pada aku depend pada org tu a kot..ade yg jenis need da shoulder..ade yg jenis leave me alone...huuuuu...ade jugak yg nak dua2 skali...tamak tul...hahha..aku pun kadang2 camtu....sumtime need space to alone...kadang2 need sumone to share...space tu aaa...ade yg besa..ade yg kecil...huuuuuu....tgk situasi aaa...tp aku mostly suke sorang2 je kot....go to the beach....to cooool...actualy igt pesanan my teacher...she used to say..kalu ade pe2 probs...try tgk laut...insya allah tenang....hmmm....mmg jadi...kuasa allah sume tu...




Dulu... Kita mengagumi nikmat cinta Walaupun di pisah dua dunia Laut... Biru ku utuskan satu nota Walaupun berabad dialun ombak Ku kan setia Nostalgia mewarna awangan Percintaanku makin mendalam Menghiasi ruang kesepian Cinta abadi Bagai rimba cinta yang berbunga Disirami sungai kesaktian Kehadiranmu ku nantikan Aku tenggelam di dalam Syahdu bisa rindumu Belum puasku menyentuh hatimu

....stay away!!!...slowww....time to alone....then pahtu mmg jadi slow....sume jadi slow..otak pun lembab nak bfikir..movemnt slow...huuuuu...i need deep breathing...plisss.....huuuuuukkkkkkk......huuuuuu......just stay away from me!!!...."

"...kosong..."

"...life is a great big canvas, and you should throw all the paint on it you can..."




......jiwe kosong...sebab ape ye..jiwe kacau..sebab ape ye....diri sendiri ke penyebabnyer...hmmm...may b...o ada penyebab laen...may b gak kot....arini ari sabtu..tak keje arini..tp sesaje datang opis...actualy mmg slalu je pun lepak opis...tp suasana arini berbeza dari sebelumnye...kenape ye...rase cam kosong je...huhhhh...ngeluh lagi...


....tadi terbaca satu luahan perasaan seseorang...very sad story....cam nak ngalir airmata pun ada...da tatau nak cakap pe..kenapa dia jd camtu..kenapa dia leh jadi camtu...sume sebab lelaki...tp aku lelaki gak...ni la kehidupan...very sad..actualy cam malas nak campur...tapi takleh...pe2 pun cam kena amik tau...tp aku just memerhati dari jauh...tak mampu tuk hampiri dia...dia pun da jauh ngan aku...so takleh wat pe2...berdoa je a...moga2 allah buka pintu hati dia supaya kembali normal...hope so..hopeee...wat happen to u....why...huhhhh




......alone in da dark....may b tu perasaan kalu org jiwe kacau kot...kosong..gelap....terasing...sendiri....aku pun camtu gak sebenarnye...hahhahah....KOSONGGGGGG....

njoy ur readin'
-copy from others..


4 years ago, an accident took my beloved wife away and very often I wonder, how does my wife, who is now in the heavenly realm, feel right now? She must be feeling extremely sad for leaving a husband who is incapable to taking care of the house and the kid. 'cos that is the exact feeling that I have, as I feel that I have failed to provide for the physical and emotional needs of my child, and failed to be the dad and mum for my child.

There was one particular day, when I had an emergency at work. Hence, I had to leave home whilst my child was still sleeping. So thinking that there was still rice leftovers, I hastily cooked an egg and left after informing my sleepy child.
With the double roles, I am often exhausted at work as well as when I am home. So after a long day, I came home, totally drained of all energy. So with just a brief hug and kiss for my child, I went straight into the room, skipping dinner. However, when I jumped into my bed with intention of just having a well-deserved sleep, all i heard and felt was broken porcelain and warm liquid! I flipped open my blanket, and there lies the source of the 'problem'... a broken bowl with instant noodles and a mess on the bed sheet and blanket!

Boy, was I mad! I was so furious that I took a clothes hanger, charged straight at my child who was happily playing with his toy, and give him a good spanking! He merely cried but not asking for mercy, except a short explanation.
"Dad, I was hungry and there wasn't anymore leftover rice. But you were not back yet, hence I wanted to cook some instant noodles. But I remembered you reminding me not to touch or use the gas stove without any adults around, hence I turned on the shower and used the hot water from the bathroom to cook the noodles. One is for you and the other is for me. However, I was afraid that the noodles will turn cold, so I hid it under the blanket to keep it warm till you return. But I forgot to remind you 'cos I was playing with my toys...I am sorry Dad..."
At that moment, tears were starting to run down my cheeks...but I didn't want my son to see his dad crying so I dashed into the bathroom and cried with the shower head on to mask my cries. After that episode, I went towards my son to give him a tight hug and applied medication on him, while coaxing him to sleep. Then, it was time to clear up the mess on the bed. When everything was done and well past midnight, I passed my son's room, and saw that he was still crying, not from the pain on his little buttock, but from looking at the photograph of his beloved mummy.
A year has passed since the episode, I have tried, in this period, to focus on giving him both the love of his dad and mum, and to attend to most of his needs. And soon, he is turning seven, and will be graduating from kindergarten. Fortunately, the incident did not leave a lasting impression on his childhood memories and he is still happily growing up.
However, not so long ago, I hit my boy again, with much regret. This time, his kindergarten teacher called, informing me of my son's absence from school. I took off early from work and went home, expecting him to explain. But he wasn't to be found, so I went around our house, calling out his name and eventually found him outside a stationery shop, happily playing computer games. I was fuming, brought him home and whack the hell out of him. He did not retaliate, except to say, 'I am sorry, Dad'. But after much probing, I realized that it was a 'Talent Show' organized by his school and the invite is for every student's mummy. And that was the reason for his absence as he has no mummy.....

Few days after the caning, my son came home to tell me, the kindergarten has recently taught him how to read and write. Since then, he has kept to himself and stayed in his room to practise his writing, which I am sure, would make my wife proud, if she was still around. 'cos he makes me proud too!
Time passes by very quickly, and soon another year has passed. It's winter, and its Christmas time. Everywhere the christmas spirit is in every passer-by...Christmas carols and frantic shoppers....but alas, my son got into another trouble. When I was about to knock off from the day's work, the post office called. Due to the peak season, the post master was also on an edgy mood. He called to tell me that my son has attempted to post several letters with no addressee. Although I did make a promise never to hit my son again, I couldn't help but to hit him as I feel that this child of mine is really beyond control. Once again, as before, he apologized, ' I'm sorry, Dad' and no additional reason to explain. I pushed him towards a corner, went to the post office to collect the letters with no addressee and came home, and angrily questioned my son on his prank, during this time of the year.

His answer, amidst his sobbing, was : The letters were for Mummy.

My eyes grew teary, but I tried to control my emotions and continued to ask him: " But why did u post so many letters, at one time?" My son's reply was: " I have been writing to mummy for a long time, but each time I reach out for the post box, it was too high for me, hence I was not able to post the letters. But recently, when I went back to the postbox, I could reach it and I sent it all at once..."
After hearing this, I was lost. Lost at not knowing what to do, what to say.....

I told my son, " Son, mummy is in the heavenly kingdom, so in future, if you have anything to tell her, just burn the letter and it will reach mummy. My son, on hearing this, was much pacified and calm, and soon after, he was sleeping soundly. On promising that I will burn the letters on his behalf, I brought the letters outside, but couldnt help opening the letter before they turn to ash.

And one of the letters broke my heart....
Dear Mummy,

I miss you so much! Today, there was a 'Talent Show' in school, and the school invited all mothers for the show. But you are not around, so I did not want to participate as well. I did not tell Dad about it as I was afraid that Dad would start to cry and miss you all over again. Dad went around looking for me, but in order to hide my sadness, I sat in front of the computer and started playing games at one of the shops. Dad was furious, and he couldnt help it but scolded and hit me, but I did not tell him the real reason. Mummy, everyday I see Dad missing you and whenever he think of you, he is so sad and often hide and cry in his room. I think we both miss you very very much. Too much for our own good I think. But Mummy, I am starting to forget your face. Can you please appear in my dreams so that I can see your face and remember you? I heard that if you fall asleep with the photograph of the person whom you miss, you will see the person in your dreams. But mummy, why havent you appear?

"..pengorbanan..."

"Haji mengingatkan kita
Sejarah pengorbanan
Pengorbanan yang ikhlas
Agung lagi suci

Kerana Allah Nabi Ibrahim sembelih anaknya
Nabi Ismail kerana Allah nyawa tebusannya

Sejarah berkata lagi
Tentang pengorbanan itu
Siti Hajar kerana Allah
Taatkan suami tinggal sendiri

Tinggal di Tanah Haram
Suami datang setahun sekali
Di tanah kering kontang
Hanya tawakkal kepada Ilahi

Tatkala Nabi Ismail lahir teruji lagi
Air susunya telah pun kering sama sekali

Siti Hajar mencari air
Ke hujung ke pangkal
Berlari-lari dari Sofa ke Marwah
Beberapa kali

Aduh hatinya cemas
Anak kecilnya tiada rezeki
Tapi hatinya teguh kepada Allah
Yakin sekali

Di dalam mencari-cari
Terpancar air dari bumi
Berkat dari tendangan
Kaki anaknya bakal Nabi

Dia pun mengumpul air sambil bersyukur
Dengan menyebut Zam-zam, Zam-zam

Itulah dia air Zam-zam
Yang kekal hingga ke hari ini
Mu'jizat seorang Nabi berkat isterinya

Sudahkah kita mengambil
Pengajaran dari cerita ini
Cintakan Allah menegakkan agamaNya
Wajib berkorban

Taat, sabar dan tawakkal
Jadikan pakaian
Cintakan Allah
Pengorbananlah sebagai bukti"

Sejarah Haji

Album : Balada Makkatul Mukarramah
Munsyid : Nadamurni
http://liriknasyid.c

...pengorbanan mmg byk ertinya...pengorbanan pun boleh dilihat dari pelbagai sudut.."berkorban apa saja, harta atau pun nyawa..." tu a salah satu bait lagu dari allahyarham tan sri p.ramlee..perit jugak kalu kene berkorban ni..tp tgk jenis pengorbanan aa ...kalu dari view korban sembelihan raya haji..perkara tu mmg elok aa..sembelihan korban ni adalah sempena memperingati pengorbanan nabi ibrahim a.s terhadap anak nye nabi ismail a.s..nak huraian lanjut pasal pengorbanan nabi ibrahim ni, elok a baca kitab..ambe dop brani nak huraikan jugok..kot2 saloh fakta kan..naye je..
...actualy gamba kat atas mmg gamba dari koleksi sndiri a..kredit to my bro,PP, dia yg amik gamba tu..tp aku edit sket aa...kalu nak ikut kata pasal pengorbanan ni..huihh byk sgt la nak citernyer...tp kalu dalam kuarga..ayah aku aa byk skali berkorban..ye aa..nak besarkan anak2 yg 10 org ni..bukan keje mudah beb..byk pengorbanan tu..mak aku pun sama..nak bayar balik harga pengorbanan dorang...huihhhhh..tak termampu aku..skang ni aku cuba sedaya tunaikan impian dorang...stakat mampu aa..hehehe..alhamdulillah stakat ok je kot...(mak ayah...hehhehe)....
....ask urself, byk mana da pengorbanan yg dilakukan...for life..of coz too many kan...tak kira aaa..duit?masa?tenaga?...huuuuuu...tapi pe2 pun jgan berkira sgt tentang pengorbanan ni..kalu cite kat org lain..blum tentu dorang paham..so simpan la sndri2 cite perngorbanan kita tu ye..hehehe

"....keluh resah..."

"aihhhhhhh......"tu la ayat bese yg kuar kalu mengeluh..actualy tak elok kalu asyik mengeluh..cam tak redha ngn ketentuan Allah je...tapi mende ni cam spontan je kua...ke mmg sebab da bese kot...haishhhh...ngeluh lagi..hehehe.. sape2 pun slalu mengeluh..asal ade perkara tak besh je..mengeluh je a..mengeluh ni bukan nyer dapat setelkan masalah pun...aku rase aa, ngeluh ni cam satu care lepaskn stres kot..coz lpas ngeluh besenya aku rase cam ok sket..hehhe tatau a orag lain camne..tp ramai je kata tak elok..hmmm..so tgk pada gamba kat atas tu..cam bese aa..bukan ade kaitan pun..saje..tapi sekali skali tgk gamba tu..cam resah pun ade...dia cam haiihhhhh...actualy lama doh post gamba ni..cuma blum ade masa nak menaip je...lgpun one of my angel nak sgt suh update...so update je aaa...
aku baru je g seminar sukses tanpa stres...cam ok gak seminar tu..byk gak blaja mende baru..mmg kurang gak stress pah g seminar tuh..blaja cara wat deep breathing, tap acupunture game dan byk lagi aaa..g teori pun byk, notes la, hand out la, macam2 aa..tu sume care utk kurangkan sterss..build up confident level, add value utk communication..huuuuuu..mase seminar ramai gak la dapt kenalan baru..dari jiran sebelah je pun..UMT..hehee..yang tap acupunture tu cam berkesan je ..nak kate 100% jadi tak a jugak..tp ade gakkesan2 dia..ye a da tap kat mata urat..mmg a ade kesan kan..aku pun ade blaja skit pasal mata urat ni..tp kt kaki a ..hehehe..hmmm cukup kot utk arini..sok aku samung la cerita kejadian selepas aku g seminar stress ni..hahhahah streeeeessssss...

"...end of da day.."

hye sume...agak lama gak aku tak menaip nih..tatau nape..malas?bz?hmm ntah aaa...skang ni pun agak malas nak menaip....ade je alasan kan..takde gamba best la..takde citer nak share la..macam2 hal la..arini ari rabu...dah pukul 5 lebih..mmg aku tak balik lagi time camni..bukan nyer sebab rajin atau byk keje..ntah la..mmg da bese balik lewat..k a sempena hari rajin untuk menaip arini..dan gamba pun pasal batu nesan kat bawah ni..mesti sume ingat aku nak cakap pasal mati..actualy saje je letak..nak stat idea..checking gamba lama2..alih2 berkenan kat gamba ni..


batu nesan mmg akan dikaitkan ngan mati..coz tu penanda kubur kot..ok a..berbalik pada tajuk yg aku buat.."end of da day.."...hmm..mmg a bunyi cam nak mati je..actualy, macam2 boleh tafsir sebenarnye..hari terakhir..last day kat tempat kerje ke..last day jadi bujang ke..last day jadi cikgu ke..cam2 aa..besenye kalu sebut hari terakhir ni..emoC slalunye akan btukar jadi sedey...itu pasti..cos hari terakhir adalah hari perpisahan...ye ke..tp bagi aku camtu a..last day adalah hari perpisahan..akhir2 ni byk sungguh aku rase cam byk perkara yg terlibat ngan "..end of da day..." ni..jiwa aku tgh kacau bilau...byk sgt pikir kot..macam2 laaaaaa..tensen ngan keje...rase cam last day je...nak abis sem je, terus rase cam ni..nape la jiwe rase camni..arini ni ari kamis...last day keje utk minggu ni..tapi weekend pun aku datang opis..hehhe..tapi sok hajat nak balik Paka aaa...lepas jumaat chow la kot..sebelum balik kene g kenduri Farouk dulu...dah janji kene g aaa..dia pun bersungguh jemput aku..anto kad by hand...last day jadi org bujang...tapi dia da kawen last week ..kira sok majlis bertandang umah dia je aaa..hadiah tak cari lagi nih..haishhh..ape la aku ni...mase free mcm byk je...tapi hasil takde mende pun..rase nak kene g jumpe ustaz nih..mintak hembus sket...hehhee..hati tak tenteram..kesan pada raut wajah..berkerut je...ramai da tego..hehe..aku da tak macam dulu...ade masalah da takleh cover da..dulu time skolah boleh laa...blaja je..tak pikir mende lain pun..skang da keje..tanggug jawab laen sket..nape la aku tak macam dulu...haishhh....aku jadi cam da x bersemangat....wat should i dooooo....please aaaaa....jiwa kacauu...serabuttt...kelam kabut...risau pun ada ni...takat ni je dulu..lenkali a samung...da tatau nak cakap pe...hope some miracle from Allah..